The question I get asked most frequently is "What is the cause of a Negative Body Image?" "What is the reason for the pervasive discontent with our bodies and our physical appearance?" With 95% of women, and a growing number of men, agonizing over their physical self, it has become an epidemic.
The most popular answer that people usually give is the media. Whenever there is a discussion about body image and eating disorders, the media is blamed as being the cause of this sorry state of affairs. Others argue that differences in brain chemistry among those with eating disorders are the leading cause of the problem. Still others point to the ready and easily accessible supply of unhealthy food in cases of obesity. What is the cause of this insecurity that plagues so many? For if we know the cause, we should be able to find a solution, right?
Now I am not going to claim that the media plays no part in affecting how people view their bodies. On one level, it certainly does. Nor am I going to claim that brain differences don't exist. There is plenty of evidence that shows human brains have unique tendencies that can lead to specific disorders and afflictions. And there is no doubt that high-fat, high-sugar diets are a contributing cause to the growing obesity epidemic. However, and this is a big however, to consider these sources to be the root of the problem is to miss the underlying cause, the cause of all causes, if you will. In my experience, the root of the problem is existential in nature: every one of the problems above stems from the fact that we have a mistaken view of ourselves and of our world.
The bottom line is that each of the circumstances mentioned above is simply a manifestation of a fundamental flaw in the way we think of, perceive, and live reality. Most of us view ourselves through a lens of inadequacy and deficiency instead of as the truth of boundless and unsurpassed beauty. We believe ourselves to be inadequate on some level: not young enough, not tall enough, not thin enough, not enough of something and too much of something else. This lens, this belief of inadequacy is an illusion, or, better said, a delusion, that cuts us off from our true nature and prevents us from seeing the beauty and the brilliance that we truly are, have always been, and will always be.
The root cause, the cause of all causes, is the failing to realize that each and every one of us is intrinsically beautiful, valuable, and worthwhile exactly as we are, right now. No matter where you are at in life, no matter what struggles you have undergone, no matter what your body looks like or feels like, the deepest part of you remains unaffected. You are right now, in this moment, inherently beautiful and perfect. As you discover this truth, as you replace the illusion of inadequacy with the truth of inherent beauty, you will discover the power to make whatever changes you want in your life. If you want to achieve better health, you can achieve better health. If you want to experience more peace, you can experience more peace. As you discover the majesty and mystery of your true being, you will discover the ability to become the person of your dreams.
Since the root cause of a negative body image, low self-esteem, and accompanying eating disorders is an identity problem, to find the solution, we must shift our identity. Here is a four-step process to help you make this identity shift, to help you abandon the lies of inadequacy and insecurity, and instead experience the beauty and glory of who you truly are.
1. Meditate.
Meditation is a key component in discovering who you truly are, the source of limitless beauty and power. Through meditation, you connect with that part of yourself that is beyond the body and the mind, that part of yourself that will allow you to create what you want in life. Meditation removes the delusional thought-constructs of inadequacy that limit your potential.
2. Realize the cultural standards of beauty are an illusory construct.
What society considers beauty changes dramatically throughout the ages. Recall artwork that you may have seen in a museum - paintings of women during the renaissance considered goddesses of beauty would now be considered overweight and out-of-shape. Modern-day photographs of runway models would probably be considered emaciated and unattractive by these painters in the past. Yet they are considered svelte and irresistible in today's fashion mags. What is considered beautiful at any given time is a social construct, subject to the changing whims of time and place. Discover yourself, not as someone controlled by the changing whims of society's fancy, but as the changeless in the midst of change. From this place of changeless awareness, you can create a standard of beauty that honors yourself in all of your beauty and uniqueness.
3. Surround yourself with people and information that affirms your inherent beauty.
As you commit to undergoing this identity shift, it is helpful to surround yourself with support. Commit to finding help during this process. Look for friends, reading materials and resources that will help you discover and honor this timeless beauty within yourself. There are many resources available.
4. Whenever you find yourself dwelling in inadequacy, remind yourself that you are the beauty of the universe manifesting as a human being.
Realize that you have a habit of viewing yourself through the lens of insecurity and inadequacy. For most, this is a life-long habit that has been cultivated since childhood. Be patient with yourself when you find yourself critiquing, chastising, and condemning who you are. Be gentle with yourself if you find yourself falling back into negative patterns of judgment. Simply remind yourself that you are inherently beautiful, loveable, and worthwhile and recommit to discovering and experiencing this truth for yourself.
Practice these four steps and you will be well on your way to transforming your identity and creating a body and a life that you love.
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